Kid Continues to Lead 1-3 Pigs in Scoring

The final score was something like 6-2. Poor everything really. "Thanks for taking that monkey off my back Lemon" summed up the night when Herrick called out to the Lem after an ill fated "Lemon Drop" in the 2nd period. Not that this blunder had any impact as the Pigs were lethargic and lacked any creativity with or without the puck and just kinda stunk. The night did however have few a flashes of brilliance: TMFG going coast to coast like butter and toast, Fraser strapping the pads on, and Pipes bringing some tastie beer. Other than that is was business as usual...Longshore screwing up the beer bitch list, stat sheet not updated, subs not bringing beer (RPM), Herrick losing the room key, and the Kid still a top the heap in Pig scoring for the 2007-8 season.

Call To Action: All Active Pigs

Lots of changes in the offseason Piggies:

-Sharks management takes over the Oakland Ice Centre
-Dennis Longshore assumes “responsibility” for both Stats and Beer
-USA Hockey rules trump the former Oakland house rules
-Vasectomies ravage a once viral and potent Center core

While all these things can’t be considered bad what should awaken even the groggiest of Pigs is the fact that coming off a Summer Champion Series loss to the vVault team the Pigs are sporting an impotent 1-2 record. That’s not the worst of it...worst yet is the Kid leads all Pigs in scoring with 3 goals and 2 assists. Get your act together boys…this is unacceptable. Get your affairs in order and let’s get er’ done!

Elves Rule! Pigs to Regroup Thursday.

Well with only a handful of Swine available for last Thursdays contest this Thursday should bring new hope to the Bacon faithful. Rumor has it that feisty Centerman Longshore had a bad case of the "sprained Labias" Word on the street is that he got his shot of Penicillin and is all better. Hopefully he will get on the ball and start assigning duties as he said he would.....not that easy is it. Kid knows all to well how hard it is to run a spread sheet. Thanks for taking it on all those years. Dennis you are now the MAN! On to Pig hockey. You know how there are just some things you have to see to believe well we have one of those moments. I have it on good authority that Rob pulled the Ultimate "Anal Bleacher" commonly referred to as a "Lemon Drop". Anyway as Papi always says "never up the middle unless you are 200% sure you can get it there". Turns out Rob was only 100% sure and that was the straw that broke the camels back. Pipes did what he could to save Rob from utter humiliation but that was not to be. Thanks Rob for joining the Lem's team, we always have room for more. It is said that someone overheard one of the refs talking and that he said "I've never refed a game before but I did stay at a Holiday Inn" This is neither confirmed nor denied by Ian but our legal team is looking into it. As for the rest of you knuckleheads who missed last game make sure you bring your A game so we can get back on top.....Lem is also guilty of absenteism so I will bring at least 220lbs. if I can swindle a trade at work. Be safe boys.

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Merry Christmas Pigs!

This is merely one Congregation's opinion.