6/30/06 Da Bing and the number 3 (Dedicated to Mangler, his wife and his faithful staff)

Lets catch up on the last two games:

6/22 vs Grey Hounds

Pigs out duel the defending champs by a score of 2-1. It only took the greyhounds :24 seconds to score however over the course of the game the Hounds racked up a mind boggling 13 penalties and found themselves short handed much of the game. A few timely goals from the tori and jack jr (not to be confused with Jack Sr) and the Pigs came out on top 2-1. No Three's here.

6/27 vs United Jets

Pigs dominate out shooting the Jets 45 -13. Final tally was an 8-2 victory. GM Jack 'Mangler' Mangan's free agent acquisitions proving too powerful even for a squad of former United Airline pilots. Teri, Jack Jr, Pitty accounting for 6 of the 8 goals...even Jack Sr found the back of the net late in the 1st period. Pigs had displayed some sloppy bench work and need to work out a few personel issues. GM Jack Sr. will have a soprano's style sit down with select players to discuss. Should note while Mangler and Lemon were racking up all the "offense" on defense the tandem of Tall MF Gary/Kid quietly posted a fat zero goals against. Pigs improve overall to 4-2. Again no Three's here.

The Sit Down (at the Bing)

To all Jack's staff I'm sure they have had this experience. While he is Irish and not Italian I recommend never taking him up on an offer to go for a boat ride (remember what happened to "big pussy" in the 4th season of Soprano's). Jack please let us know how the "sit down" went and if you have resolved all the personnel issues. No three's here either.

Three's:
I heard on Emeril Live last night that Asians consider the number 3 lucky (source: Yan Can Cook). Mangler: need you to consult the Oracle...your sweet wife. Better yet bring her to the game on Sunday!

6/15/06

There a few things out of place last Thursday night when the Pigs fell to vVault 4-2:

1) New Referee (black guy...not getting all racial here...just identifying). Dino...any comments on his officiating?

2) Captain Mac not at the game. Instead he was home icing his balls due to a recent Vasectomy.

3) Fast Eddy's been replaced with a more environmentally friendly and courteous gentleman named "Inspiration" Mike. We gotta get this guy working our bench.

4) Jimmy's seems to be loosing Thursday night business to the nightclub down the street. If Oakland PD didn't roll the Pigs and the team drinking beers next to us would have been outnumbered by natives 3-1. Normally this would not be an issue however Fraser was not in the house.

6.6.06 Best Week Ever

We knew the week of 6.6.06 was going to be interesting however we had no idea it would turn out to be the BEST WEEK EVER. Before the game we were all pumped cause our Canadian brothers nabbed those 17 terrorists on 6.05.06. You see we have a significant number of Canadians on our roster so management has to pretend to get excited when the royal mounted police bag a few bad guys. To the US it's simple...racially profile and call it day...Canadians see things differntly and wait for the fuckers to almost blow something up before stepping in. Whatever...good score...yeah Canada. So 6.6.06 the Pigs are matched up against the Edge...good, tough, physical team we've been playing against for almost 8 years now. Not to understate the achievements of the Canadian government but Pig GM and Grillmeister Manager made a score of his own by signing a strong 21 year old LW named Tori (he's Canadian) to a one game contract. Five mintues into the first period Tori finds the back of the net in front of a capacity crowd of 1 (Tori's 38 year old dad). The rest of the game belonged to Mangler's award winning Craig's List acquisitions from 2005, Sodapop and Pit. Did I mention that Jeff stopped all 22 shots he faced? Well he did but there will be an asterisk by the game cause he did sacrifice a chicken and was overheard chanting satanic verses prior to the game. Pigs win 4-0 despite missing the presence of long time Pig and Minunte Man, Fraser. Where was he? Shit...only bagging one of the most wanted shits heads of our time...that's right...Fraser was remote and on the ground guiding the boms to Zarqaui's hide-out. Like I said Best Week Ever!

Notes:

>Fast Eddy "snubbed" for the 1st time in the Post Greenspan era

>The "Summer of Gracie" continues as he racked up another 2 pts leading all Defensmen through game 3 with 5 points.